Corporate Language!!!

Today are going to study a bit about corporate language or corporate communication skill...here some example how it works...

"We will do it" means " You will do it" "You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you" "We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same" "Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done... At least not tomorrow !". "After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do" "There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied" "Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later" "We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time" "We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time." "We had slight differences of opinion" means "We had actually fought" "Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me" "You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!" "We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is" "Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected" means "Well you know..." "We are a team" means "I am not the only one to be blamed" "That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it" "All the Best" means " You are in trouble"

This kind of language was not been teaching to us at school it comes from experience ...

SALAHKAH CHEQ PAKAI TUDUNG??????

Gambar hiasan

Sadis betul...

Aku mengeliat sepuas puasnya. Nasib baik takder siapa

nampak cara aku mengeliat. Mahu jatuh saham aku huhu.Tiba tiba aku teringat kisah semalam. Airmata terus berlinang. Terasa amat sayu dan sedih. Salah ke kalau aku nak pakai tudung? Naper abah tak benarkan? Buat pengetahuan korang, bapak aku ni jenis orang yang sibuk giler. Businessman yang sentiasa sibuk. Mak aku dah takder. Meninggal dunia lama dah. Sedih sangat sangat. Dari jendela, kelihatan cahaya matahari mula menjeluskan diri ke celah celah langsir tingkap. Jam dah 11:00 pagi. Perut lapar. Aku bangun capai tuala, masuk bilek mandi. Lepas mandi, aku belek belek tubuhku pada cermin. Alangkah lebih cantik kalau aku bertudung. Aku nekad! Aku akan protes habis habisan kalau bapa aku tak nak juga bagi pakai tudung. Aku sanggup lari dari rumah. Demi kebaikan yang aku pilih. Lantak la dengan ahli keluarga aku yang lain lain. Semuanya tak nak pakai tudung! Tapi aku nak!!!! Aku turun ke bawah. Baru jea nak buka tudung saji atas meja, terdengar bunyi kereta masuk garaj. Aku jenguk melalui tingkap dan nampak bapa aku balik. Aikkkk, apahal bapa balik awal ni??? Dalam masa yang sama, aku rasa inilah masa yang terbaik untuk desak bapa aku benarkan aku pakai tudung. Now or never! Bila bapa aku buka jea pintu, aku bersalam dengannya dan tanpa lengahkan masa, aku kata, ""Daddy, cheq nak pakai tudung. Cheq nak!" Bapak aku terus jegil sebesar besarnya. Macam ada api keluar! Panggggggggggggggggggg. Bapa aku hayun penampar ke muka aku! Tersepok aku di celah set sofa. "Aduhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....sampai hati daddy! Cheq tau la daddy rasa malu kalau cheq pakai tudung. Salah ke kalau cheq nak tutup aurat cheq? Kalau adik dan abg tak nak...." Pangggggggggggggggggggg....! Bapaku labuh pelempang ke muka > aku sekali lagi sebelum aku abis bercakap. "Hang jangan nak bagi aku malu naaaa! Hang jangan nak buat pasai! Hang nak > pakai tudung buat apa??? Dah 100 kali aku habaq, LELAKI TAK PAYAH PAKAI TUDUNG, LELAKI TAK PAYAH PAKAI TUDUNG!!! Tu la, bila time kelas agama, hang ponteng! Nama hang aku boh "Razali", tup tup lekat jadi ZAZA sahaja! Memang la dalam rumah ni semuanya tak bertudung sebab adik hang tu lelaki! Abang hang pun lelaki jugak!". Aku yang tersepuk celah sofa, terus menangis terkedu kedu. Dah la sakit kena tampar, kena pelempang. Tudung pun tak dapat jugak. SALAH KAH AKU? SALAH KAH AKUUUUUUUU! OOOOO tidakkkkkkkkkkkkk!

****KWANG3X.. TEKUN BACA HEH , DARI ATAS .... RELEX LAR ME ALSO DAH TERKENA X KAN NAK KENA SORANG2 PLAKKKKKKKKKKKK ....

My NeW nEw hAnDpHoNe

oLaaaaa....Sawaddee..hello...waiey...i got new handphone. Sweet isn't it...hihi..it was given by my hubby. Actually I wish to buy it on my own. But my money was not enough, then my hubby said it's ok you only have to pick which one you like, don't bother about the price. Me wait no longer as fast as lightning grab this one. I likeeeee it very much. Thank to my hubby who are soooo generous buying for me this Handphone. He said after this u don't need to carry your camera as it has 4gigs of memory card. Thank you for being so understanding. I like to take a photos of every event to upload it to my FB and of course to this blog indeed.

- Sony Ericsson W705u

GENERAL	2G Network	GSM 850 / 900 / 1800 / 1900
	3G Network	HSDPA 900 / 2100
		HSDPA 850 / 1900 / 2100 W705a
	Announced	2008, October
	Status	Available. Released 2009, March

SIZE	Dimensions	95 x 47.5 x 14.3 mm
	Weight	98 g

DISPLAY	Type	TFT, 256K colors
	Size	240 x 320 pixels, 2.4 inches
		- Accelerometer sensor for auto-rotate

SOUND	Alert types	Vibration, MP3, AAC ringtones
	Speakerphone	Yes

MEMORY	Phonebook	1000 entries, Photocall
	Call records	30 received, dialed and missed calls
	Internal	120 MB
	Card slot	Memory Stick Micro (M2), up to 8GB, 4GB card included

DATA	GPRS	Class 10 (4+1/3+2 slots), 32 - 48 kbps
	EDGE	Class 10, 236.8 kbps
	3G	HSDPA, 7.2 Mbps; HSUPA, 2 Mbps
	WLAN	Wi-Fi 802.11 b/g, DLNA
	Bluetooth	Yes, v2.0 with A2DP
	Infrared port	No
	USB	Yes, v2.0

CAMERA	Primary	3.15 MP, 2048x1536 pixels, LED flash
	Features	Geo-tagging (cell-ID)
	Video	Yes
	Secondary	Videocall camera

FEATURES	Messaging	SMS (threaded view), MMS, Email, Push Email, IM
	Browser	WAP 2.0/HTML, RSS
	Radio	Stereo FM radio with RDS
	Games	Yes + downloadable
	Colors	Luxury Silver, Passionate Red
	GPS	No
	Java	Yes, MIDP 2.0
		- MP3/AAC/MP4 player - Walkman 3.0 player - Shake control - SensMe - TrackID music recognition - YouTube service in Media Center - Picture editor/blogging - Organizer - Voice memo - T9

BATTERY		Standard battery, Li-Ion
	Stand-by	Up to 400 h (2G) / Up to 350 h (3G)
	Talk time	Up to 10 h (2G) / Up to 4 h (3G)

MISC	SAR US	1.15 W/kg (head) 0.74 W/kg (body)
	SAR EU	1.01 W/kg (head)